I am far too much a casual Christian. I don’t attend a regular church or Bible study, and I should. I know I should. I am a better person when I read/study the Bible regularly; more patient, more giving, less selfish. I could attend the MIL’s church; the kids are welcome, I’m welcome, the pastor is lovely but I don’t feel full when I leave. So a summer goal is to shop around for something that will fill me up.
Anyway, almost daily I am filled and feel blessed listening to the message coming from lifeFM. If you are in (most parts – frequency list at the bottom of the web page) of NZ or listen online (www.lifefm.co.nz) and want upbeat, CLEAN, current music with a good message, I totally recommend this station for everyday listening. Secular music plays (as long as it is clean, so it’s more attractive to the teen), the hosts are by turns funny and insightful, not smooth & slick (try the 7.30am news for a laugh), normal stuff is talked about and they have a sense of humour! Plus it’s clean. Did I mention clean? That’s important to me given the kids soak stuff up like a sponge.
Coming around to the point, there is a frequency auction coming up soon. Rhema Media is trying to raise a million to help pay for some extra frequencies to spread the Word. If you can give a little, it would be appreciated. Click here:
And this person? Amazing on air, amazing IRL. Holly, take a bow J She does so much – announcing, promotions, organising – BAKING – interviews – lots of stuff
Max Pemberton: I’m embarrassed by public breastfeeding
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‘Of course, breastfeeding is only natural, but so are lots of things that I don’t want to see or engage with while I’m eating a muffin.’ Photo / 123RF
When it comes to breastfeeding in public, we are all supposed to stand up and applaud the practice. It’s one of those things that all right-thinking, liberal, sensible people embrace.
When women are shamed in some way about this – for example, this week when Facebook removed a picture posted by a female user of her breastfeeding her premature baby – there is a public outcry.
If a woman is asked not to breastfeed in a restaurant or cafe, opprobrium is poured down on the offending institution until it capitulates and embraces it along with everyone else.
I used to be wholly supportive of public breastfeeding. As a doctor, I know only too well the incredible health benefits to the baby.
But then something happened to change my mind. One of my friends did it in front of me. In fact, over the past few years, more and more of my friends have had children, and so I’ve been confronted with breastfeeding on numerous occasions.
Suddenly, public breastfeeding has stopped being an abstract ideological debate and started to become a reality.
As a result, I’ve been exposed to parts of my friend’s bodies I’d never wanted to see before and, what’s more, it’s over a pumpkin-spiced latte in Starbucks.
One minute they’re talking about who should have won The X Factor, the next they’ve got a baby clamped to their breast in full view of everyone.
I’m going to be honest – and please don’t hate me – but it makes me feel acutely uncomfortable. Of course, breastfeeding is only natural, but so are lots of things that I don’t want to see or engage with while I’m eating a muffin.
What’s more, it’s not something that can be just tolerated: increasingly, it’s one of those activities that is publicly applauded. Why do we need to celebrate other people’s private biological functions? It’s easy when strangers breastfeed in public – you just look away. The horror comes when it’s the person you’re out with, because it comes with the agonising debate about where to look.
The dilemma is either to stare at the floor, making it obvious you’re uncomfortable, or to absolutely, under no circumstances, break eye contact, in case your gaze momentarily wanders. I break out into a cold sweat every time it happens and, when I eventually confided in some (childless) friends, they, too, confessed they felt the same. Yet the social narrative that surrounds public breastfeeding is that only the heartless, cruel and ignorant do anything but adore it.
It is therefore forbidden to utter even the fact that it makes you uncomfortable. The breast-is-best lobby has become a powerful, vocal force to be reckoned with. They’re not the oppressed minority- that’s the rest of us.
I think the debate about breastfeeding has become very strange, part of a larger phenomenon where women’s lactation has become public property.
Everyone has a view on new mothers and their bodies these days. Women who choose not to breastfeed are ostracised and considered bad mothers, as though it’s anyone else’s business how they choose to feed their baby.
Having said all this, of course people should breastfeed in public if they want to. Just because I’m uncomfortable with it, doesn’t mean people shouldn’t do it. It’s my problem, not theirs. There should be more facilities for women to breastfeed in privacy when they are out and about.
I, too would rather sit at a table in a cafe if the only other option was a dirty, cramped public toilet – so I can’t blame breastfeeding mothers, even if I don’t agree with them.
I did confide in a friend a few years ago that I found her repeated public lactation a little strange. “Oh I know,” she said, laughing. “I love watching you squirm, it’s so entertaining. When you’re on maternity leave and up all hours with a baby, you have to take your entertainment where you can get it.” Maybe, after all, the joke’s on me.
Max Pemberton’s latest book, The Doctor Will See You Now, is published by Hodder.
Stolen from the Herald. I also love how Pemberton’s sharing his view, despite the expectation of rabid feral feedback that will most certainly be posted. As a society we are far too PC and not tollerant where other’s views don’t agree with our own.
I spent most of today up at the Scenic Drive house. Starting to fall in love with some parts of it.
The view from the study book w
This. Oak tree in the pot, waterfall in the ponds behind. I love the sound water can make. Thinking the previous owners a little insane for putting such a large tree into a pot but it looks pretty. Oversize bonsai? Must Google that.
I started on most of the removal projects today but got hussled by K and the FIL (Si was out shopping, he’d be happy if the next job was with Bunnings). I was really looking forward to more bash.
This unit is gone, as is the pointless bookshelf that was on the other side of the window. Barely wide enough for cd’s let alone books. Pissed the cat off a bit, movrf down to the study.
This was ugly. Gone now!
Looking up. Always looking up.
Also have a bit of bike envy. She brought back a mountain bike that I think I’ll grab once she is done – the idiot was only fractionally taller than me so should be OK. Or buy myself one with my bonus next year.
Tomorrow planning a long, quiet walk. Think I need some space!
The SIL moves into her new house this weekend. Currently we are here feeding the out going vendors cat + fish and I’m watching the city fade from view as the rain moves up towards the Waitakeres.
Zac is taken with China, the seal point Burmese. She’s lovely, nearly 18. China is staying for three months too.
I have negotiated a new job, well in time add my current contact is maternity leave and I have no idea if she will return. Security is worthwhile.
And creatively, I’ve been back doing Project Life. Last night I caught up with seven pages so June to August is done. Let’s not mention 2013!
This is a good reminder that faith works. And sometimes it doesn’t work (from our limited points of view) but we need to have the grace to wait. Everything works for the good.
Every now and again I see something on fb that makes me go “wow” (in a good way. Those other wows are more frequent, and resulted in a friend clean up).
I printed off a saying for a co-worker for a laugh and she wanted me to stitch it for her. I found a nice border from a site with historic patterns. I was working on it at my guild meeting and it got some giggles because it is so true. I used ThreadworX Chilli Peppers for the border and Woodland Green for the text.
One of the things that has annoyed S about our current home is that the ground was so uneven. It never had that perfect freshly mowed look. Someone would twist an ankle or fall over when playing backyard cricket or league or just being a typical boy. So we’ve spent a fair bit of time and money sorting this out; two retaining walls, new fences, clean fill, top soil, grass seed.
We got a notification that our street was getting high speed broadband. The other side of the street got dug up, we thought Awesome! They left our lawn alone.
So last week I had the brilliant idea that I should follow Anne’s example and rotate stitching. So I planned a start to Stargazer, kitted up another Nora Corbett/Mirabilia (Mediterranean Mermaid) and planned on working on Tapestry Cat in week three.
It’s week three and I can’t be bothered with TC. Part of this is a reluctance to pick up the confetti like stitches, part is the flu. I have the man flu! Managed to get one of the strains NOT covered in the injection, which was not clever of me at all. Stink bro, as Gish sings…